Life.....less than none!!!

Emotions overrated
Reality understated
Dynamic fluctuations
Conflicting situations

Web of desires
Burning pyres
want for more
Acceptance of what’s in store

Difference of thoughts
Miscommunication in lots
unidentified state
Disaster’s bait

Wavering footsteps
revamped preps
Fear of the unknown
defense walls grown

Simple decision
Focused precision
the done can’t be undone
a life less than none

.....and I break down and cry!!!

When I feel them walk all over me
Knowing my pain, they will not bother to see
Its then that I feel like tearing the world apart
A fire of rage, burns within my heart

When I see myself fall flat on the ground
I feel the thorns below and around
If only I could destroy the garden of life forever
The lure of flowers tells me to do that never

When I feel I am alone
Supposed friends ready to hurt with knives and stones
Its then I wish I had someone
Soon realizing soul mates for me are none

When hard work brings failure always
I yearn for the better days
Its then that I feel I am doomed
And hope someday I’ll see the bloom

When I see people playing games
Lauding me, then calling me names
Then I feel ashamed of it all
Wondering why they stoop so small

When I see my dreams shatter in front of me
When the question is to be or not to be
When every breadth of mine pinches like a sword
Its then I scream and say why! O Lord!

How desperately I try to fill my heart
To get up and make a fresh start
Have the faith and courage to try
But all I do is break down and cry.

The Deep Blue Ocean!

So calm and at peace with itself and yet the world is unaware of the turbulent waters it hides without a sign of turmoil. Giving life to millions of living organisms, bearing every load of the land, bearing the load of harness every moment giving many a baffled souls solace and tranquility.

Morning shows the hustle and bustle of the fisherman trying to make their living; men and women from all walks of life use the purity to wash of their sins. The birds hover over the only part of the universe they trust apart from the sky. The sky that itself bows to the magnanimity.

Noon brings in the loneliness; cause the world needs to accomplish the goals and
ambitions that it had defined for itself. No one remembers its existence and its any perceived value, only the net laid down by the fishermen bruise the already wounded heart of the this bed in blue.

Evening brings in the cheer, as lost souls caress the winds that adorn it and then dump their dirt on it, yet there is a cheer within the blue for the want of being acknowledged for existence.Night everyone has somewhere and someone to go to, however, the blue stays there stagnated for yet another day when life would be just same as it has been for the past thousands of years

The kings of modernization know it to be the only source of unlimited tangible profits.

The only thing that seems to care is the rain, without hesitation, without condition, it falls on the blue with all its love and refuses to leave the side of the blue.

And then one day unable to bear all that is stored inside, like a dormant volcano it erupts and just engulfs the entire universe in its fold, leaves no stone unturned and the aftermaths of which are felt for days together.

Once the job is done the blue goes back to its normal self for another thousand years where it will give many a shelter, love and total unconditional commitment to just give and not take back anything

That my friends is the description of the Deep Blue Ocean by an author, I read it once, then again and again and again, cause there was something that told me there is more to this than appears!!!……………….and then it hit me, did she just describe HERSELF!!!!!!!!

The search that never ended....

She lay in peace and her epitaph read "the endless search; that is still on". Every breadth a new struggle, a new fight, a cloud of fear engulfs every ray of hope. She tried; she left no step unturned to make sense of the madness but now she finally succumbs to try new worlds for a different realm.

But is her search over those questions still unanswered

Why for what and till how long????

All the way she wondered why her parents kept convincing her to follow the path of righteousness, be kind to others. Never hurt anyone knowingly. Never want something that you do not deserve

What they should have told her was to follow the path of righteousness, rarely. Be kind to others as long as it serves ones own purpose. Hurt people and be ignorant about it. If there is something you deserve, snatch it…. or else you will never get it.

She reached close to Insanity trying to solve this entanglement between her inner and outer self and lost her peace. The day she let go was the day she became free, because it did not matter what she did, she lost all sense of judging what people did and why they did it.

All that mattered to her now was running after the butterfly, basking in the morning sun’s glory, getting drenched in the rain, smiling at every passing soul who looked at her as if she was from another planet…but she never felt the scorn, all she felt was unexplainable bliss…something she had never felt before. It did not matter anymore

Yet, her eyes were always moist…she could not explain nor identify what it was that made this happen but this was it, she would be laughing at something she liked, such as a carefree child would, and tears rolled down her eyes, all in the same instance.

She kept searching wondering, but no answer came to her, she was clueless of this phenomenon that was building up inside her.

She meandered in vain with her quest for life and after it ended did she realized that what gave her this inspiration to her present path was her silent nemesis ...